So it’s been over 24 hours since Liverpool secured three points at Selhurst Park and we have decided to have a little round up of the papers and Liverpool based fanzines like ourselves and come to some sort of conclusion.

Having watched MOTD, Goals On Sunday and multiple YouTube replays I may have altered my own opinion on certain players. For example, I feel I was a little harsh on Sadio Mane, not giving two shits about Neil Swarbrick and his view on the ‘foul’ which he never gave but proceeding to take the matter into his own hands was a positive not a negative.

Loris Karius – 6

Forgive me father for I have sinned. I read the Daily Star online. Not my proudest moment but its all for this, it won’t happen again. Until next week. Anyway they gave Karius a 6 too. Oddly they don’t seem to explain why or give some sort of opinion, presumably because it would take consideration and you can’t include a picture of tits.

The Liverpool Echo also gave him a 6, you can thank me later for saving you the job of checking their site. Amazing reporters, amazing work but fuck me its an advertising minefield.

 Trent – 6.5

I gave Trent 6.5 yesterday, maybe I could push it up to a 7. Does anyone really care what I think? Probably not. Anyway his second half performance was much better than the first. He is a young lad, at 19 he has much to learn. I won’t share with you what I was doing at 19 but it wasn’t playing footy for Liverpool.

Wilfred Zaha is also a superb footballer who has been around for years, he gave Liverpool an early warning which Trent should have learned from, he needs support. From now on he should just assume his team mates are never going to win a duel in the air and just backtrack regardless.

Anyway This Is Anfield gave him 5.5. Understandable actually given his was run ragged in the first half. And as they’ve rightly pointed out a foul throw is embarrassing no matter how old you are!

The Express went with 5 “Caught ball watching for the opener. Better as the game wore on”

Thats it.

Well what an insightful and half arsed way to do player ratings, better than The Daily Star like, but put some effort in!

I didn’t skip to Mo Salah but I presume it was something like – Mo Salah – 7 – “Did a goal”

Joel Matip – 5.5

So yesterday I gave Joel a 6, mainly because he reminded me of the waving inflatable tube guy.

For this one I’ve turned to Read Liverpool who have also given him a 6. And like other sites, they have decided to back it up with an explanation. He was poor, he was bullied and I’m not sure what he provides Liverpool with sometimes. Usually his passing from back to front is exceptional, but it was surprisingly terrible yesterday.

The Hard Tackle, a site I had to double check was defiantly about sport, gave Matip a 5. I can understand why, he plays a massive role in the penalty leading to the goal and rarely supported Trent in the game. FYI, another site ridden with adverts.

Stick with us and you’ll be just fine.

Virgil Van Dijk – 7

I dread to think where we would be without big Virg. He did have an arse clenching moment when he gave the ball away after some sloppy play. Fortunately for him Benteke couldn’t hit a donkeys arse with a banjo.

The Mirror, another website run on adverts about fixing bunions, Now TV and well, everything you don’t care about really. They also gave Van Dijk a 7, which could have been higher had Sadio Mane not sent his goal bound header wide with his header.

Andy Robertson – 8

OHHHHHHH ANDY, ANDYYYYYY, ANDY, ANDY, ANDY ROBERTSON!!

Best player in a Liverpool shirt for me, Mr consistent. The Rush Kop gave him a 9!! And do you know what, I agree. Probably the best left back Liverpool have had since Djimi Traore, jokes, I mean John Arne Riise.

Robertson has the full package, tireless running, great defensively and sound going forward. His crossing is world class, which I know is a term over used but I’m convinced he could have saved Benteke’s Liverpool career if they played together, if Benteke could finish and if we hadn’t signed the best player in the world in Mo Salah. Soz Christian.

Jordan Henderson – 6

Gone to The Anfield Wrap for this one, probably the best player ratings I have ever read tbh. After mine, obviously. Anyway they’ve given Hendo a 7. Maybe I was a little harsh on him, I think in general our midfield was poor yesterday, bullied by Palace in the first half and frustrated in the second.

Mr Chris Pajak gave him a 5 in his player ratings, again I can understand why. Coming away with three points is fine but our performance needs to be much better going into the next three games.

Anyway if you want to read less from me and see more of the beautiful Mr Pajak here’s the link https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qpdUMuIAUkQ

Gini Wijnaldum – 5

Well I gave him a 5. I love Gini, I love his smile, I love him using his arse to bully people off the ball, but we just need that extra something from him, a killer pass, a burst forward, anything.

He has been ill over the past few weeks in which he best runs have probably been to the toilet.

Anfield Index also went with a 5 and highlight his away performances as bizarre. Yep, sums it up nicely, Again coming back from an illness and significant weight loss can’t be easy for Gini but I expect a much better performance from him if he plays against City or The Ev.

I’m not having that gravy fiend Allardyce getting the better of us with his shite tactics.

James Milner – 7

I feel a 7 was justified for Jimmy. The best of our midfield three, my opinion was in no way influenced by my new found love with him on social media. Milner encompasses everything Liverpool fans want from a player. No fucking about, OK maybe the odd feint but in general its hard graft, grit and determination.

SofaScore have given him a 7.6, very precise. Although it does give me a chance to throw some stats at you.

Duels won – 8/16

Pass completion – 83%

Key passed – 4

Assits – 1

 

Sadio Mane – 7

Sadio, what a hero. A mixed bag for him from ranging from 6-8. It really was the Sadio Show. A goal line clearance, a goal, a dive/no dive, a booking, a blatant hand ball and a Kung Fu kick celebration. He had the lot!

As The Rush Kop point out, that penalty decision is one Spurs get every week. You don’t give Harry Kane two chances. Prick. More practice needed Sadio lad.

SofaScore gave him a 7.3 and they know their shit so I’m just going to stick with a 7. Could have easily been sent off, he wasn’t so hat trick versus Everton incoming, you read it here first.

Mo Salah – 8

This is Anfield gave him a 6.5!! Had he not scored the winner I could understand but to have such a quiet game and still produce the goods is the sign of a quality…..well. winger. It’s a game of opinions so I’m not saying they are wrong, but take into account Mo put Sakho on his arse, twice.

He’s still getting an 8.

Roberto Firmino – 6

I gave Bobby a 6, which hurt me. He’s my favourite player by a mile. On reflection he lacked service and support. Did he let it affect his effort and his desire? Not on your Nelly!

Sky, The Independent and Anfield Index also went with 6’s which made me feel less guilty.

ESPN on the other hand gave him a 5!! Not sure what they’re smoking over there.

Hard to judge the subs. Make your own mind up.

Overall fairly low scores for the Liverpool players. A much better performance is needed from everyone going forward. However, silver lining pissing on Woy’s chips and bringing the three points home. Up the Reds.

Also The Croydon Times, yes thats a real thing, gave Benteke a 3!! HAHAHAHAHA

Article by @rossic89

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